As if your shoulder brushing
against my breast in a crowded room
meant anything to me…
As if your smile would thaw my frosty heart…
As if your constant assurance could overcome my cynicism…
As if the invisible boulevard would never rise up and beckon.
<> | <> | <>
The street lamp glows in the bleached mist only three floors below us.
I blow streams of smoke into the black night and hum to the drone of the unseen road.
Be steel my bleating heart!
Be quiet! Be silent, hard steel.
As if wearing your tee shirt made us lovers.
Some famous person once said, “Write drunk. Edit sober.”
Who am I to argue with such wisdom when I have so much writing to do.
by Janna Hill
Above the noise
I hear your voice
With an oh so mellow
Where sunbeams rain
Through nicotine stains
That remind me of your
… and I miss you.
And here we are–the same bat time, same bat channel as last year.
April is National Poetry Month/NPM. Whether you read my poetry or that of someone else, I only ask that you read; expand your horizons. Poetry is not only for scholars or ‘esteemed’ individuals – it is for everyone!!
March 8th is International Women’s Day. Yep, it’s a real thing and I was just pondering—me being a woman and all. Oh how I do love to ponder….
There is a crap load of rhetoric out there about gender parity (gender parity is just a new term for sex equality) but the idea is to make International Women’s Day a day to do what you can to make a positive difference for women. Press for progress… (Hashtag that).
Along with #PressForProgress I would like to add #EqualRights, #EqualPay, #EqualRespect….
Did I mention #EqualPay and #EqualRespect? Yeah, that would kind of lead to #EqualRights.
Man that WOULD be progress!
Q: Is any of your fiction true? Do you write about real life?
A: Well yes and no. For example a visit to Rockford Illinois for my granddaughter’s graduation inspired the following scene which takes place somewhere in the historical Lake-Peterson House.
Our dog Leia was the inspiration for the physical description of Gus and that is her on the cover.
There is some truth in the fiction I write. I will leave it up to the reader to decide where that truth lies.
Chapter Twenty Five
Mary paced the empty hallway on the third floor of the ancient house. She counted fifteen steps from one lamp to the next and wondered if the people below could hear her. The dark corridor seemed to grow shorter with each lap along with her patience. She considered unlocking her mind so she could tap into the thoughts of those around her but intuition advised against it. Occasionally she paused to listen at the door; each time she found the words indecipherable and returned to pacing until a gentle creak caused her to stop.
“You may go in now.” A flat voice announced as the heavy door gave way. Sunbeams flooded the hallway and Mary squinted at the figure in front of her; at the starched white cap and unwieldy dress which were as outdated as the house.
“Thank you.” Mary stepped forward and warmly squeezed the woman’s shoulders. Her affections were met with a rigid withdrawal but not before she could catch a glimpse of the nurse’s frontal imaginings. As her eyes adjusted to the light she could better see the nurse’s features; her round face as stiff as her attire looked like a plate cemented between the pinned head covering and cinched collar.
“Thank you.” Mary reiterated with less affection as she slid past the nurse and closed the door behind her.
The floorboards groaned as Mary hobbled across the oversized space toward a single bed in the corner. Jim glanced up, forced a smile and promptly turned his attention back to his wife.
“How are y’all?” Mary anxiously inquired as she cast an eye over the new parents.
“We… we’re all fine.” Clara mumbled, straining to open her eyes.
“Where are the babies?” Mary asked, glancing suspiciously around the bare room.
“One of the nurses took them over to the hospital – said they had to be examined – tests and shots – routine stuff.” Jim explained as if trying to assure himself. “They will bring them back as soon as they’re finished… as soon as they make sure they’re both in good health.” His voice trailed as he tenderly bathed Clara’s pale face.
“That makes sense.” Mary tried to sound convincing but the smell of sweat and panic made it difficult. She lifted Clara’s moist flaccid hand and asked, “How are you sweetie?”
“I can’t…” Clara whispered, gasping between words, “can’t … hear… Frieda.”
“Don’t worry love.” Jim paused briefly to blot his own forehead and neck before sweeping the salty cloth across his wife’s.
“Mama?” Clara’s eyes fluttered.
“Something is wrong!” The vision appeared as red paint flowing over a white canvas and Mary yanked the sheet back. Doc! Mary opened the vault of her subconscious, honed her thoughts on the old doctor and yelled. Doc! Hurry! Her brain was inundated with voices and images as the internal walls fell away; the extrasensory chaos proved to be too much and she collapsed on the floor.
When Mary came to she could see the doctor standing over Clara, pressing and massaging her abdomen. A bottle of clear liquid hung at the head of the bed and a pile of blood stained sheets littered the floor around them.
“She’ll be okay now. We just have to let the medicine do its work and keep the fundus firm.” He spoke in a casual manner. “Fetch me another bag of special blend Gus and be careful not to puncture this one.” The white shepherd sprinted to the door, his claws creating a rapid rhythmic tap against the wooden floor as he ran.
“Do you think he will speak to me?” Jim stood in the same spot, still sponging his wife’s face as he spoke but the scent of panic had lessened.
“Maybe.” The doctor replied suppressing any signs of optimism yet Mary could see the previous conversation between Doc and Gus. She grinned as she raised herself to a standing position. The shepherd would soon have a new home.
“I guess the sight of all that blood got to you. Are you okay now?” Jim asked without taking his eyes off of Clara.
“I guess so.” Mary laughed, rubbing the small lump on her head. “Our girl definitely looks a lot better.” She said, running her fingers across Clara’s rosy complexion. “What happened? Why did she bleed so much?”
“That happens sometimes, especially with twins.” Mary accepted the doctor’s verbal response without debate as he knew she would. The truth of the matter would be kept secret between the two of them for the time being. If Jim learned of the attempted murder he would retaliate and that could put Doc and Gus in a dangerous situation. “Good boy!” the doctor took the pint sized plastic container from the dog’s mouth. “You rub the fundus just like I showed you James.” He said as he quickly inserted a fifty milliliter syringe, filled it with the thick crimson liquid and injected it directly into the intravenous line. He repeated the process nine more times until the bag was empty and the bottle overhead was dry.
“When can I have my babies?” An invigorated Clara sprung up and demanded, “I want Fritz and Frieda right now. If they are not here in five minutes I will go and get them myself.”
“Are you sure you are capable of handling them right now?” Doc asked.
“I am more than capable.” Clara took the salty half-damp cloth, snatched the I.V. from her arm and applied pressure. “I believe I am capable of taking this place down and everyone in my path to get to my children.”
“I believe you.” The old doctor smiled.
“What did you give her?” Jim shook his head and laughed, “An hour ago I was afraid I was losing her – now I’m just afraid of her.”
“You have nothing to fear.” The doctor’s face lit up with a shrewd grin, “As long as you are one of the good guys.”
“I’ll tell my nurse to bring the babies now.”
Within minutes a lovely petit woman entered the room with a bundle in each arm.
“I hear the new mommy is anxious to hold her little ones.”
“Oh yes.” Clara cried, extending her arms.
The nurse carefully placed the infants in their mother’s arms. Frieda was nestled on the right and Fritz on the left. The twins instinctively turned their face to Clara’s breasts and began rooting and grunting. She in turn lifted her blouse and guided each mouth to an engorged nipple, welcoming the throbbing and stinging as they gulped.
“I have never seen anything so beautiful.” Jim’s voiced cracked as he spoke. “I have never felt so blessed.” He glanced at the others around him. Mary sniffled and held her hand to her mouth, the old doctor nodded and smiled and the white shepherd pawed at the tears streaming down his snout.