The Real Janna Hill

Pardon My French

Pardon my French or rather my lack of. While you’re at it please pardon my inability to speak any language that doesn’t include ain’t and y’all. I’m a Hick. There, I’ve said it.

I have at times been mistakenly called a hillbilly but that is not the correct terminology. For the record I am not a hillbilly. The only hills in my neck of the woods are inhabited by moles. I, sir or madam am a Hick. A Hick from the sticks, residing in a rural wooded area shared with other uncouth creatures and Hick type peoples. I do not live in a mobile home but would like to when I get rich.

I am however a worldly Hick.  My electronic travels have taken me places I never knew existed, far beyond the bounds of a barbed wire fence. I converse with all sorts of people from different creeds, castes and cultures made possible by use of a translator tool. I am getting quite an education.

I speak Hick and a little bit of French. You see around here we say “pardon my French” in conjunction with cursing. It is a built in irrevocable vindication. Calling it French makes it completely pardonable, e.g.  “He is a lousy son of a bitch, pardon my French.”

I think the translator tool is an awesome invention but sometimes what one intends to convey gets a tad bit distorted in the conversion. (Note: English is the closest dialect to Hick currently available)

Here is an example of how the aforementioned statement describing a worthless man can get misconstrued in a non- Hick translation.

From English to French “iI est un fils de pute moche”

From French back to English “He is a son of a ugly bitch”

No, no, no! Calling him a ‘lousy son of a bitch’ was about him. Calling him ‘a son of a ugly bitch’ directs the insult to his mother. (Whom you may happen to like very much)

I suppose calling someone a son of a bitch is technically an insult to their mother regardless, but calling her ugly just seems too rude.

Linguistics. Now that is some interesting sh*t.  Pardon my French.